Wednesday, August 09, 2006

LONG TIME NO SEE

Wow, has it been a long time since I've posted. Things have been a bit on the crazy side lately, but hey, when ain't they. So anyway, here it goes with reviews of a disc or two and as was promised oh so long ago, a review of a SANTO flick. So without any further ado.....

HASIL ADKINS - OUT TO HUNCH (NORTON RECORDS)
"I didn't try to be primitive. I just had bad microphones." That is without doubt, one of the greatest rock n roll quotes of all time. I know there are many, but this is definitely in the pantheon of rock verbiage. Yeah, Hasil is most definitely primitive. How primitive? He makes the Waka Chalaka tribe of PaPau New Guinea seem like the Jetsons. I sincerely doubt that you could boil rock n roll down into a more pure form. This is true blue hillbilly rock n roll. No fag art rock here, this is straight from the chicken coop floor gang. You've got yourself a flannel shirt and a Nirvana record and you think your grunge? Ha. You don't know grunge pal. Hasil was laying down the real thing way back in the 50's. Check out the twisted psychosis of WE GOT A DATE. Man, that whinny, pussy Cobain could never touch something like that.
This disc is real rock n roll, not rockabilly, rock n roll. Not for the faint of heart.

THE BEVIS FROND - INNER MARSHLAND (PAST PRESENT)
psychedelic astronaut head trip freak rock. This thing is brain surgery man. This thing melts in your mind, soars, explodes, splatters all over the inside of your head, and then the pieces morph into something else and the whole thing starts over again. Or something like that. If you have a bong, you need Bevis.


EL SANTO VERSUS THE VAMPIRE WOMEN DVD
If you haven't seen a Santo movie, you really do need to get out there and find a copy and give yourself a treat. Yeah, sure these are b-movies, but b-movies are really where its at don't ya know.
So ok. If your impatiently awaiting the next Spielberg blockbuster, or the next Ben Afflek(?) movie, you may be too far gone for a Santo flick to save you.That's extremely unfortunate.
Many people will resign this film to the category of "so bad it's good", but I don't think that's completely fair in this case. Yeah, it has it's hokey moments, and yes those hokey moments do have that retarded charm us trash movie lovers love, but this movie can stand on more than just those things. For one thing (and I'm sure many will disagree) but I don't think the acting in this movie is so terrible. I would go as far as to say that every single actor in this movie is better than Keanu Reeves or Steven Seagal. Taking this movie as a whole, if you thought that WHITE CHICKS or BLADE TRINITY were good films (they weren't)then I can't see any reason you shouldn't be giving this film a try. Pure escapist fun. Isn't that why you really watch movies?
Anyway, you haven't really seen inspiring cinema until you've seen a masked Mexican wrestler kick some monster ass. The scenes where the body builder vampire henchmen run will have you laughing. They stretch their arms out to their sides holding the edges of their capes, it's like demonic ballet on steroids. AS for the real selling point, any movie that uses the term booby hatch should win an academy Award.